Taking responsibility and not passing the buck is the overriding factor to both personal and business success.
Making things happen is no small feat. Sometimes to make something good happen it takes a quick minute or the right decision, other times it takes years of set up, problem solving and planning. Whether it’s finding the funds to remodel your business, revamping your work structure, or even scratching out a little me time, trying to finagle things for a positive outcome can be difficult. Many times it’s easier to stay the course then to put the energy into going in a different direction.
Easy might work for the moment but in the long run, it’s just an excuse for avoidance, and excuses can lead to stagnation on all levels from work, to family, to personal well being. Excuses also take the onus off of the individual and pass the buck to someone or something else.
I admire people who own their own businesses because they made it happen. I admire people who had a goal from when they were young, an idea that made it, a career path or company they always wanted to work for… and got there. I admire these people because they live their life with no excuses. They are walking testaments that nothing gets in their way.
It seems no matter where we turn, we’re being told our problems are the fault of someone else. Frightening. Flashback to the eighties; this is where I first noticed the blame game. Back then if a girl was too thin, it was Kate Moss’s fault. Today, if a girl is too heavy…. it’s Kate Moss’s fault or any super model on the planet. Times sure have changed, sort of. It’s a frightening aspect when you take the responsibility off of an individual and put it on someone else.
I think women who eat healthy and work out consistently, are a step in the right direction. Do I do all those things? No. I guess that’s why I’m not a size two. That’s okay with me. I do eat well, I’m vegan and I stay away from processed or fast food. However, I definitely don’t exercise as I should, but that’s my fault.
Not the fault of some one in the public eye. If I eat that doughnut, there’s no supermodel standing next to me stuffing it in my mouth. If I wake up and don’t do twenty sit ups and twenty push ups in my bedroom, that’s my fault. I can do those things but I don’t because I have excuses.
The new thing is average Barbie or some sort of doll that looks like an “average” girl. Well, I didn’t play much with Barbies when I was a child, but I did like my Charlie’s Angels dolls. Never obsessed over looking like them, just thought they were cool because in the show the women kicked butt. I never had a problem with Barbie until I went to college and I was taught that she was the devil. Still didn’t get it because Barbie was a doll who was pretty and fun to dress up. The doll never made me feel uncomfortable.
Now there is the call to arms for a doll that looks like an “average” girl. I read about the measurements they used for the average girl and realized I didn’t have those measurements when I was a teenager. That made me feel uncomfortable. Does that mean I’m different in a negative way because I didn’t fit the norm? Is that what this doll will be shouting to the world, “You are not normal or average!” Now that sounds like something that might cause a girl to compare herself to a doll.
For me, Barbie was just a doll. Never thought about looking like her because: 1. She was blonde and I was brunette. 2. She seemed taller than me. 3. She was a DOLL for entertainment purposes not a call to erase who I was and become a doll. Same with my Charlie’s Angels dolls. My favorite Charlie’s Angels doll was Jaclyn Smith because she was very pretty. That’s it.
Image, Marketing Hype and Reality
When I was about nineteen I bought a whole set of make up from a display in the pharmacy. I probably dropped fifty dollars on the promise of beauty and was sure I’d be one little hottie once I applied the set. Got home, put it on, and voila! I didn’t look anything like the gorgeous gal on the display. I looked in the mirror, laughed, and said to myself, “that’s because you’re not her”.
Anyone who has bought something once in their life, gotten home and figured out that the product doesn’t live up to the marketing, knows that you take advertising with a grain of salt. Here’s a secret…. celebrities who endorse products, spend hours in hair and make up. Shhh, don’t tell anyone, it would ruin the illusion.
I take offense to people who bully and post images of fit women and say they aren’t “real moms” or “real women”. Really? Because they seem real to me. They look like living, breathing women who live a life of no excuses and make sure they are a healthy role model for their children. No, I don’t want to go into a store and see a mannequin that reflects the current unhealthy American lifestyle. I’ll take the skinny mannequins that say, “put down the doughnut and judge yourself by your own standards” as opposed to “this is what everyone else supposedly looks like”.
What about the people who go to the doctor (we’ve seen this hundreds of times) and the doctor says if you don’t change your lifestyle you’re going to die? They see the light and spend the next year eating right and exercising. They lose a hundred pounds and look fantastic and fit through hard work. Are they not “real” because they have bucked the unhealthy American norm, saved their lives, and look fantastic?
Inspiration and No Excuses
I recently met a man who had letters tattooed on his fingers between the knuckles of his palm and finger. I asked him what it said. He turned to me, made two fists, and extended his arms. The tattoo read “Drug Free”. Then he explained that he put the letters there so when he drove his car he could see the words. Brilliant! He put it in his face, right there, everyday for himself and only himself to see. I find him inspiring to not allow himself any excuses. It’s all on him, literally, and he lives with it in his face everyday.
What if we all did that? What if I put “Do 50 Situps” on my knuckles? I would probably do them because the statement would take away my excuses. What if we embraced fit supermodels as women who were paid to look good and work hard at their job everyday instead of bashing them and blaming them for our shortcomings? How cool would it be to look at ourselves and figure out who we are for ourselves instead of comparing ourselves to a doll, a mannequin, or a celebrity?
Achieve Success- Don’t Pass the Buck
I would like to think that most people, at some point in their lives, have accomplished something by leaving the excuses at the front door. What ever that accomplishment was, a business, a new job, or a great idea that came to be, why not carry it over into every aspect of our lives? Instead of putting energy into blaming others, why not put the energy into benefiting ourselves? If you aren’t happy about something, fix it. No excuses. Get up, go get it and let the dolls be what they are… dolls. Instead of passing the buck, put it in your own pocket.